I told him about something that happened to me as a kid and he said "that wasn't even that bad, you should be over it by now." I haven't brought up my feelings since. I don't think he wants to hear them.
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Last night we were arguing and he punched the wall right next to my head. He didn't touch me, just the wall. He said he would never hurt me but I felt the air move when his fist went by my face. I can't stop thinking about it.
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He smashed my laptop last week during a fight. It had all my work files. He said if I hadn't made him so angry he wouldn't have done it. Now I'm hiding things I care about when I know he's in a mood.
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Last night he wouldn't let me leave the room until I apologized. He stood in front of the door. I wasn't allowed to eat or sleep until we "resolved this." I finally said I was sorry just to escape. I have no idea what I apologized for.
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He's been "going to therapy" for six months. Nothing has changed. He still yells, still breaks things, still blames me. I think he's just saying it to buy more time. I'm tired of waiting for different.
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He said "I've never hit a woman but you're really testing me" during an argument about dishes. I didn't even raise my voice. Now I'm scared to bring anything up because what if I "test" him too much?
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He ignored me for five days after I said I needed space. Then yesterday he showed up with flowers and apologies and promises. I was so relieved I took him back immediately. Now I'm realizing this is a pattern. Punish, then reward. Repeat.
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He said "you look great for once" when I got dressed up for dinner. When I got quiet he said I was being too sensitive. His compliments always have a dig in them. I don't even feel good when he says something nice anymore.
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He shoved me into the counter and then said "look what you made me do." I'M the one with a bruise but somehow I'M the one who caused it. He keeps saying if I didn't push his buttons this wouldn't happen. I'm starting to believe him.
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I tried to break up with him and he said "If you leave me I'll kill myself." I stayed. Now every time I try to talk about problems he brings it up. I feel trapped and responsible for keeping him alive.
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He insists on driving even when he's been drinking. I've begged him to let me drive or call an Uber. He says I'm being controlling and dramatic. Last time I tried to take his keys he shoved me. I got in the car.
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We fought until 4am even though I had work at 7. I kept saying I needed to sleep and he kept saying "we're not done talking about this." I was so exhausted I agreed to things I didn't mean just to make it stop.
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I found my birth control pills in the trash. When I confronted him he said they're "poison" and we should "just see what happens." I'm 23. I don't want kids yet. Now I don't know if I can trust him with my body.
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He made me turn on location sharing "for safety." Now he texts me if I'm somewhere I didn't mention. He'll say "I saw you were at Target, why didn't you tell me?" I feel like I'm being watched constantly.
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I woke up at 3am and he was scrolling through my phone. He said he couldn't sleep and was "just looking." I don't even know what he saw or what he's looking for. I feel violated.
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I've told him three times I don't like being tickled. Every single time we're together he does it anyway and laughs when I get upset. He says I'm being dramatic and can't take a joke. But I asked him to stop. Why doesn't that matter?
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He came up behind me and put his hands around my neck "as a joke." I froze. When I told him it scared me he said I was being overdramatic and he was just playing. But there's nothing funny about not being able to breathe.
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He "playfully" shoved my dog with his foot when she got in his way. He's made jokes about hurting my cat. When I got upset he said he was kidding and I'm too sensitive. But I've started keeping my pets away from him.
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He made a joke about my weight in front of his friends. When I pulled him aside later he said "God, can't you take a joke? You're so sensitive." But it wasn't funny. It was mean. And now his friends probably think I'm uptight.
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He gets drunk and mean. He'll yell, throw things, call me names. The next morning he apologizes and blames the alcohol. It happens every weekend now. I'm starting to plan my days around whether or not he'll be drinking.
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